*this is a sarcastic
I have been watching a local businesses do things all wrong on Yelp over the past year and can’t take it anymore. I really wanna help these guys out, and maybe educate them on how to do a better job when spamming Yelp. So here goes….
The Culprit: On the image below, you will see a screenshot I took from the Yelp app on my iPhone. The arrows are pointing to the number of reviews these “reviewers” have (all just 1). I have circled the part that says “Matt is the best computer guy…” No, it’s not me, just have the same name as this dude. Here is the deal, I have been watching this guy spam Yelp for about a year now. Every couple of weeks or so, he goes in and writes the most amazing 5 star reviews (always 5 stars, never 4 lol) and almost always uses the owners name (Matt) and every couple of weeks, Yelp finds out, removes them and he continues to be persistant and going through the whole cycle. Over and over and over and over again, but I digress …..
This has annoyed me so badly (because I have to see this every time I log in to Yelp and look at my local feed) that I want to help him learn a better way of spamming Yelp. I have listed out 5 steps below that can help my spamming friend do a better job!
Step 1. Add a profile image: I know DUH, but wow … If you are going to have only one 5 star review (and many of them), make sure and add a profile image to all these fake accounts you make. It’s one of the most simplest steps to help you seem “more real”. You can go to Google image search and find a ton of different beautiful looking heads that you can even use as your very own! Yea … one step closer to Yelp spamming world domination.
Step 2. Read Reviews From The Yelp Elite: First of all, go read real reviews … check out the elite reviews, most of them are not using names (as you have done) you might also learn how to write a review that reads normal (oh and what Yelp looks for in reviews) – and if you have a fake review that reads normal, it just might not get flagged … over, and over and over (not even by me … but the community).. Nobody talks the way you do, no trust me….they really don’t! (and they all read the same way, you know, like maybe the same person wrote them all??) Seriously – look at that first review … and read it. If you truly did have a “nasty virus” you are not going to talk like that. sigh….
Step 3. Fake reviews for other businesses: One of the best ways to make your account look normal is to review your own business with accounts set up that have multiple reviews, over time, of lots of other businesses. Not all 5 stars either….come on man, I am trying to help you look “normal”. It might not be a good idea to review YOUR business first either … leave less of a trail and make it a little more difficult for Yelp to find out you are faking these reviews too. Here is an idea – maybe leave some REAL reviews while building these accounts up, of real businesses that you have actually gone to & enjoyed or hated … no wait, we are spamming here, we don’t want to be legit. Just write real looking fake reviews (read the above two steps) moving on.
Step 4. Space out your reviews: It does not look normal if you are getting 5-10, 5 star reviews EVERY WEEK (especially when your competitors have zero or 1-2 reviews) – slow down there cowboy and space it out a little. Rome wasn’t built in a day and neither will your spamming empire be built in a day. One of the biggest flags set off is when this type of stuff happens, so make sure and do a little bit better of a job spacing it out. Maybe start off with one a week even, with these new legit fake accounts. My guess is some of these reviews will actually stick.
Step 5. Be an active spammer: You can’t just get on Yelp, and leave the 5 star reviews for your business and never log into it again with these fake accounts. That’s just silly if you are really wanting to be a Yelp spammer. You need to seem like you are real, like your reviews are real, and that you are an active member of the Yelp community. Comment on other peoples reviews, send them compliments … ya know, use the system. You might even get some friends out of it, and look more normal too by doing so. It may take a little more effort, but since you obviously know the benefits of Yelp & your Yelp listings on the SERPs … taking the extra step will be worth it. In the end you will be doing less
Ok, I could probably go on and on, but I think this will give my friend some good ideas to get started (and I am tired of typing). In all seriousness now …. learn the community you are so desperately trying to become a part of, and how it works. Reverse engineer what I am saying here ,and you just might catch on .. once you do, you are gonna be amazed at what Yelp will really do for your business when you are going about it in a legit manner.
Update* Here is an awesome infographic we put together for Andrew Shotland that I am sure you guys will enjoy.